Xanga Archives 02/22/2006

I Hate My Hair

I've had the same plain 80's hairstyle for about (well..hmm...since the 80's) 25 years. It's long, straight with short bangs that I can fluff, or feather, or make "big" hair when the time is right.

These photos are very similar, to kind of give you a general idea. Think long and straight like the blonde (only mine's longer) and layered and puffy on top like the brunette.

My husband likes my hair because it's long, but he wants me to grow my bangs out. My first reaction is "gross". When they grow, they get heavy and flat and I can't style them worth a darn! I've mentioned this to him, but he insists that I look good with all of my hair long. I totally disagree...

My dilema...do I grow them (I've actually already started - and they do nothing but hang in my eyes) or do I stand on my personal rights to have my hair the way I want it, because it's my hair, not his or do I do as he asks and learn ways to fix my hair and learn to tolerate the way I look in the mirror?

Well, my baser instincts will always go with the latter and I can come up with a plethera of reasons to support my side of the arguement. It's easier; I like it better, therefore, I'm happier, therefore I look better to him; my hair is very thick and when my bangs are long, pony tails give me headaches (this is actually true); etc, etc, blah, blah, blah.

My husband has already conceded and told me to do whatever makes me happy, because, that's just the kind of guy he is, but...my goal is to make him happy, so I conclude that the second choice is my only choice and I'm going to give it my best shot. I've actually tried once before, and went back to my first choice and cut my bangs, but I love my husband very much and if he wants my hair long, and I grow it long, then it only serves to benefit us both. The better I look to him, the more he's gonna show it :)

Your husband should be willing to love you no matter what you look like, but if looks were not a factor in relationships at all, then why would a woman ever make herself more attractive to catch a man in the first place? And...if a woman is willing to gussy up to catch a man, why not do it, to keep him and/or keep him happy?

Now I know that many of you are going to poo poo my little rambling, but I thought I would share it anyway, just as an example to the wife who is consistantly complaining about her husband's lack of interest in her, but is unwilling to sacrifice of herself to better please him (namely me).

These have been the ramblings of an imperfect wife in her search for a perfect marriage.


P.S. I'll let you know when and if I crumble and cut my bangs anyway...maybe I'll get lucky and my husband will change his mind!

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disclaimer:  caution must be taken when reading my blog.  i'm a new creature and the Lord continues to mold and shape me through his will.  older entries may seem to contradict the newer ones.  there's a pretty good chance that they do for two reasons.  first, because of my nature, as i strive for perfection, i will continue to fall short of the mark and should therefore be thankful for his grace and should seek his (and your) forgiveness for having been so foolish in the past.   second, i continue to grow in him; and as changes are made, i have made attempts to change my blog to reflect those changes. in this event, please refer to #1.   if you're interested in perfection, my blog isn't the place to be.  pick up a king james bible (yup, i'm one of THOSE people) and read his PERFECT word.